**********
Dear Krochet Kids International,
I am writing to express concern about a phrase on your website. Given that you are a good-will organization, I do not think that you intended this phrase to come across the way it does. However, I cannot support the utilization of such language.
This is the product description for your Steven laptop case:
“ Protecting your computer has never done so much good.¬† This thin laptop sleeve allows us to go above and beyond fulfilling our mission statement (to empower people to rise above poverty) as it’s not only crocheted by our beautiful Ugandan women, but also utilizes materials sourced from local vendors.”
“Our beautiful Ugandan women” is thoroughly offensive. “Our Ugandan women” indicates/implies ownership. As I am sure you know, you do not own these women. A more appropriate phrasing would be something like: “it’s crocheted by Ugandan artisans using materials sourced from local vendors.” Or perhaps, “it’s crocheted by skilled Ugandan craftswomen.”
Furthermore, the use of the word “beautiful” here is also inappropriate. I am sure it was intended to be a compliment, but it actually reduces the women you claim to partner with and support. Since you do not qualify the statement in any way, it seems you are referring to their physical beauty. What does it matter if a laptop case is crocheted by a “beautiful” woman or an “ugly” one? The physical appearance of women in Uganda has NOTHING to do with your business. Why is it even mentioned at all? Do you feel that your customers will only support women in business if they are pretty? I can imagine that this would be marginally relevant if you were selling skin-care products or something of that sort, but I don’t know what it has to do with crocheted materials. Instead of focusing on the women’s skill, work-ethic, or business savvy, you have reduced them to being simply “beautiful.”
I believe your hearts are in the right place with your business and mission, but that the current copy on your website is not representing you very well. Please reconsider the message you are sending.
Sincerely,
.....
Yes, yes, and a thousand times yes. If you get a reply I would really like it if you shared that as well.
ReplyDeleteA few additional thoughts that are not in the email:
ReplyDelete1) I was considering buying this laptop case for my husband, until I read the description. I was literally so disgusted that I gagged. This language affected my decision to purchase. Many people will not notice or care, but I am sure there are others like me as well. It would be a shame to allow poor copy-writing to hinder the impact of an organization that may actually be doing some good. That is why I wanted to call their attention to it.
2) If you think this email seems superfluous or silly, consider this. Imagine a similar organization that supported carpentry instead of crocheting. You would find it odd if that organization wrote a product description that said, "This coffee-table was built by one of our handsome Ugandan men." Really, in 2011, how is it that women are still only talked about in terms of how they look? Why aren't we talking about all that women can do, will do, have done, and are doing?
3)Thank you to my friend Elissa (greenmoonrising.blogspot.com) for encouraging me to actually write, send, and post the letter. I expressed my concerns to her in conversation yesterday. As a fellow woman and English major, she got it.
No response from the organization and no change on their website.
ReplyDeleteStill no response?
ReplyDelete